Late Night useless musings

[bigdogchief76]

So with all the time I've had to lie around, I am beginning to reconnect with my appreciation for music. Some where, some how, over the course of my life I lost the deep rooted passion I had for music when I was younger. Life just got to busy to stay in touch with the musical gift I was given. Perhaps I'm getting a second chance to better utilize the gift given too me. Who knows?

Strangely I listened to an old album written in the late 80's, called "Operation: MindCrime". A classic, well written rock opera by Queensryche. Its eerily prophetic of the current political mire in the US.

Any way, there is a song talking about a mission that the protagonist Nikki was on. A line goes "...my mission changed my world, it turned my life around"

I've spent long, sleep deprived nights over the past few weeks (months?; I've lost track of time recently) researching and studying for the appeal I just sent in last night. Regardless of the outcome, it changed my life around. This entire ordeal (chronic back pain, insurance, etc.) has rocked the foundations of my once stable life and changed my world. I'm just so tired.

If I was capable of REM sleep, I'm sure the line in the book "The Two Towers" by Tolkien would fit well: "...dark have my dreams been of late". I don't know what's worse; the un-ending pain or inability to sleep for long stretch of time due to pain.

I felt like throwing the remote through the tv the other night when the infomercial for the mushroom looking device that's the miracle cure for low back pain. The thing looked more like a sex toy found in Bangkok then a low back device. How can they get away with advertising for that thing and outright lying about its success for curing ddd?! Hogwash!

Enough ranting, I just needed to vent about nothing for a while...

MB

[Cindylou]

Rant away! No one will chastise you for doing that here, that's for sure. Hang in there. I know, easier said than done. Cindylou

[KBear]

Sorry Matt, hope tomorrow is a better day. Everyone needs to let it out every now and then, so rant away.

[KanRunMo]

You can enjoy your kids just by sitting and listening to them. That's what the "old grandmothers" used to do. They couldn't play ball, they couldn't run with their grandkids but they just sat in the rocking chair and listened and everyone benefited. My mother loved teaching so since I was the youngest kid, she went back to work when I started kindergarten. We had a lady come in for the afternoon. She didn't say much but would listen to me and nod and smile. Since we had a busy family, it was a treat to have someone just listen to what I was saying. That can be your treat to your kids until you are active again and you will be active again. I hope you do take up your music again.

[Cindylou]

You can enjoy your kids just by sitting and listening to them. That's what the "old grandmothers" used to do. They couldn't play ball, they couldn't run with their grandkids but they just sat in the rocking chair and listened and everyone benefited. My mother loved teaching so since I was the youngest kid, she went back to work when I started kindergarten. We had a lady come in for the afternoon. She didn't say much but would listen to me and nod and smile. Since we had a busy family, it was a treat to have someone just listen to what I was saying. That can be your treat to your kids until you are active again and you will be active again. I hope you do take up your music again.

Wonderful words, kanrunmo. CL

[bigdogchief76]

bigdogchief76

If interested I started a semi-journal of things going on.

In addition to music, I'm finding writing about this journey is somewhat therapeutic in nature.

I don't post regularly, just when I need to.

Thx for all the encouraging words