4 weeks out - my step back?

**Katiem3987** · 02-20-2012, 11:09 AM

Week 4 starts today. I feel in worse pain than earlier last week. Trying to use walker less to build up strength nut then it makes my right hip/butt aggravated.

I have not been able to turn on my right side since pre-surgery. I tried yesterday and now all the muscles going down right side are irritated and angry. I only lasted maybe a minute over there. I can roll left and sleep left with no issue.

Just upset and frustrated. My mom leaves in 2 weeks and pre-surgery the neuro told us I should be fine taking over by then. I know I have 2 weeks but am freaked out I won't be there.

Please tell me here in the next few weeks will be a good turn around. I read where people are walking a mile+ by now and I am nowhere near that.

Feeling frustrated.

**ajj1001** · 02-20-2012, 11:22 AM

I'll almost guarantee you'll feel alot better by 3 months, at 6 weeks you are just finishing your recovery and starting your rehab. Sounds like you have been pushing it a bit trying to do without the walker and your expectations might be over ambitious. Are you back for a check-up with the neuro at 6 weeks?

**Katiem3987** · 02-20-2012, 11:36 AM

Yes I see him in 2 weeks. My husband is taking week 7 off. Then that's it. My mom lives in MO and I am in KY. So she can't just pop into help

Don't know why I thought I would better than this

**ajj1001** · 02-20-2012, 12:28 PM

I think we expect that the surgery is the main thing and forget what alot our body has to do afterwards to recover. You should be ok to do the basics and look after yourself if your husband can leave things all ready for you. Mine did a flask, tablets, butties etc. I didn't dress unless I felt up to it and showered when he got home.

**Katiem3987** · 02-20-2012, 01:10 PM

My kids are 3,4,8. Mostly worried about 3 year old. He is still in diapers. Though old enough to climb on bed and lay for you to do it. I am just afraid I won't have energy to keep up. Afraid if we went outside I would not be able to chase him should he run toward road, ect.Guess we will just have to stay home bound for a bit. I will have to get daughter from preschool starting week 8. Husband will take her. Hope I can drive by then - thought is scary right now.

**ajj1001** · 02-20-2012, 02:52 PM

yikes, three is pretty little. Guess all you can do is see how you are at 6 weeks and discuss how able you are going to be come 8 weeks and your concerns at the recovery rate. Are you on no bendlng/lifting/twisting restrictions? hope you start to see improvements soon and don't get too down.

**Kimberly** · 02-21-2012, 09:01 AM

Hi Katie,

Hang in there. Things get better (it is just so very slow that it is hard to see sometimes.)

I agree with Alison that at around 3 months I was feeling significantly better and was able to do much more. I didn't use my walker much, but part of that (I think) is that I am quite tall and could not get my walker high enough and was always a little "bent" in order to use it. And outside, the sidewalks are so full of cracks that it was "shuffle shuffle shuffle stop lift (ugh) put down (ugh) shuffle shuffle shuffle." So it was actually better for me to be on my own. I had help for about 4 weeks, and I remember how scared I was at the thought of them leaving and being alone. It turned out ok, but then my kids were older and in school during the day so I could rest and nap when I needed. I didn't really DO anything while on my own during the day, just existed without loved ones hovering. No cooking, cleaning or much of anything else. I think I might have made toast. And slept. I remember having friends help pick my kids up (and take them to soccer, etc.) because I still wasn't able to drive and frankly didn't have that kind of energy anyway. It was hard enough getting out of bed and shuffling to the front door to let them in). We started a little carpool so it helped everyone. It is hard for me to admit I need help, let alone actually ask for it, so this was haarrrrrrd for me, but necessary. I think I grew in a "new-agey, personal-growth type of way."

Is there a friend at your preschool that could help with pick-up? Or have your little one over for a play-date? I remember being completely exhausted at 4 weeks and especially in the afternoon/evening when little folks tend to need a little extra "something" too.

I know it might not help with the details of managing responsibilities, but I think you're right on track in your recovery. Hang in there. It gets better.

Kimberly

**Kimberly** · 02-21-2012, 09:03 AM

PS. Week 8 is much much much better than week 4.

**Katiem3987** · 02-21-2012, 01:15 PM

I guess part of my trouble is I am a glass 1/2 empty kinda person.Not a good fall/winter. We moved to KY from MO in November. My son has epilepsy and had a bad bout of seizures about 3 weeks in and ended up being admitted 2 days to the nearest Children's Hospital - which is in TN. No family here and it just sucked.Then back went out in December mom had to come because I was in bed 6 days and husband couldn't take off. Couldn't go home for Xmas added to pain. Early Jan goes put again and mom comes out.Go to neuro thinking discectomy ( issues date back to 2004 but current ones this past April ) and he comes in and talks fusion...,So now mom has been here since early Jan back going out. Staying through surgery. She is 70 and has my 3 kids. Worn out and misses home.We have no real local support as I have not had a chance to make any friends. A really unideal outcome to big move somewhere new.Sorry to unload on you all. Just so depressed and overwhelmed. Wish I was back "home". Feel all bad omen like LOLNo offers on the preschool front. Sure hate to take her out. She goes T/TH from 9-130 so I will only have the 3 year old. The 2 of them together are quite the devious pair

I have been sending my oldest on playdates. Thankfully those moms have been very helpful. I swear enough of my crying. I know everyone here has their own set. I hope somewhere down the line I can be the helpful one