[Micodiscectomy, Laminectomy & Laser Decompression] Surgery on January 21st

[Mollyhopp]

Yesterday I almost gave up hope altogether. I called the hospital to ask if they'd scheduled my operation yet. They hadn't; and there were no available slots until late February at the earliest - despite my being on the prioritized list. My surroundings went gray. I cried (or whimpered - crying is too painful) although I was out in public, and the tears just refused to stop running for hours. I doubted that I would be able to keep my spirits up that much longer when every day is such a struggle. I miss my son, and miss being his mother. My greatest feeling of failure is not being able to take care of him. He has been living with my parents for the past month now, and I see a day or two a week.

This morning a phone call from the same nurse lifted my spirits. She had heard the devastation in my voice, and wanted to know if I was ready to go under the knife next week. There had been a cancellation, which fit the schedule of one of their spine specialists. I felt like I'd just won first prize in the lottery.

So, next Thursday it is. I've decided to look upon surgery as a positive and interesting new experience, and see the hospitalization as a relaxing spa-getaway (that worked for me last time around).

Being the girl I am, I hit the shops, looking for cute and comfortable outfits I can wear instead of hospital gowns. I came home with two oversized t-shirt dresses, more convenient than cute but I'm hoping they'll do the job. I try to remind myself that I'm not ill, only my spine is; and getting dressed and putting on make-up helps keep me afloat. So that's my plan for the hospital stay as well. Those of you who are more experienced - do you have any other advice for keeping spirits high and hope up?

I also had my 2nd MRI today. Apart from having to lay on my back for 20 excruciating minutes, it went well.

On Monday I'm going in for surgery prep. I don't know what to expect, was only told that it'll take 3,5 hours and I'll meet the surgeon, anesthesiologist, physiotherapist, and get a guided tour of my ward.

Keeping my fingers crossed.

[scduggan]

Dear Mollyhopp,
I am SO EXCITED about your surgery being moved. WooHoo! You sound like you will now be able to hang in there. I will be thinking of you. I am also waiting for lumbar surgery. The hardest part is without a doubt the whole "not being a proper Mom". I also really love your statement about just your spine being sick. Good Luck...next week will hopefully get here soon!
CD

[Justin]

This morning a phone call from the same nurse lifted my spirits. She had heard the devastation in my voice, and wanted to know if I was ready to go under the knife next week. There had been a cancellation, which fit the schedule of one of their spine specialists. I felt like I'd just won first prize in the lottery.

So, next Thursday it is. I've decided to look upon surgery as a positive and interesting new experience, and see the hospitalization as a relaxing spa-getaway (that worked for me last time around).

Wow, wow, wow! This is such great news!!

Being the girl I am, I hit the shops, looking for cute and comfortable outfits I can wear instead of hospital gowns. I came home with two oversized t-shirt dresses, more convenient than cute but I'm hoping they'll do the job. I try to remind myself that I'm not ill, only my spine is; and getting dressed and putting on make-up helps keep me afloat. So that's my plan for the hospital stay as well.

Linn, this is very true. You are not "ill." The pain associated with spine issues can make you feel like there is something wrong with you; however, it is key to remind yourself that your spine is making you feel this way and it does not accurately reflect reality. I am excited for you to move past the pain and on to feeling good again--I understand just how draining (physically & mentally) spine issues can be.

Those of you who are more experienced - do you have any other advice for keeping spirits high and hope up?

I tried to focus on the goal of surgery: to correct was what "wrong" with my spine and to ultimately give me my life back. Also, being confident in your decision to move forward with surgery was encouraging to me that I was doing the right thing and that it was the time to move forward.

On Monday I'm going in for surgery prep. I don't know what to expect, was only told that it'll take 3,5 hours and I'll meet the surgeon, anesthesiologist, physiotherapist, and get a guided tour of my ward.

Keeping my fingers crossed.

The surgical prep will most likely involve a detailed discussion with the surgeon about your situation and the proposed intervention. The anesthesiologist will explain his/her role in the operation and the physiotherapist will explain postoperative instructions regarding how to get in / out of bed & exercises that will "jump start" your recovery. Overall, the surgical preparation should help put you at ease and help you better understand what to expect before and after surgery.

I wish you the very best and please let us know if you need anything.

[ajj1001]

- do you have any other advice for keeping spirits high and hope up?

Good to hear that you are getting all set for next week.

I got a new bottle of red nail polish ready for when I got home. Having little goals that you can achieve post surgery is good. I found it difficult to read after surgery so having a stack of dvd's to look forward to and some good magazines cheered me up. I think you have the best goal of getting to spend more time with your son.

[Terry Newton]

You might want to get a checklist going so that you remember everything to take as this is such a stressful time before the surgery. It's a drag when you are at the hospital recovering and forgot something important. I developed lists upon lists and went in to the hospital fully prepared. I had my iPod for music to relax by, reading materials as I get nocturnal and can't sleep in the night, my own pillow (Tempur-pedic) for my cervical comfort, plus all of the comfortable pairs of sweats so that I could not have anything interfere with the incision site, etc. You may still miss something but it won't be so dramatic with less preparation.

Congratulations on the opening. Good luck with everything and it sounds like you are in good hands.

[Mollyhopp]

Thank You Thank You Thank You for your support and kind words!!

[Mollyhopp]

Ask and it is given... After a couple of good days, I found myself almost wishing a bit of the pain back, if only to justify next weeks surgery to myself. Presto! It's back with a vengeance, both the nerve pain and extreme stomach ache when I take my pills. So I've raised my opiate dose, and gone back on ulcer medication, as well as another medicine to lessen the side effects of both of those. At least now I'm more motivated than ever to have the operation, and being stuck in bed I have time to post here. I live for silver linings

Terry, the checklist is a great idea, thanks! Especially now, when my mind is so clouded - I started typing two (one for hospital, one for home) as soon as I read your post.

Alison, I hadn't even thought about DVD's; that went straight on my checklist, and having a couple of days to go I went online and ordered boxes of tv-shows to get as many hours of distraction as possible The hospital has free wifi, so if I get a private room I'm taking my laptop with me (putting chargers and cables on my checklist along with DVD's).

I also love the idea of the nail polish. Measuring the small steps of recovery must be great for the morale, I'm going to think up more such examples to be have as mini-goals when I get home (e.g. sitting down for a meal, cooking, remember what day it is at the top of my head, lying down next to my son to read a story book, eventually painting my toe nails). Thinking of all the things I'm not able to do now motivates me even more to get back to normal, and then some.

Justin, thanks for letting me know what to expect on Monday! Yesterday I received a letter from the hospital pretty much paraphrasing you They're also going to get blood samples and do an EKG. My only fear is I'll have to lie on my back for that

CD, thank you for your caring enthusiasm. I hope time flies until your surgery!

And to everyone who passes by this post, Have the loveliest of weekends!

/Linn

[Justin]

Linn,

We are thinking about you daily.

[Mollyhopp]

For the first time in ages, I don't feel scared. Instead I'm happy, peaceful, and optimistic

I spent all morning at the hospital, meeting the lovely people who are going to help me get my life back.

My surgeon walked me through the new MRI results - both herniations had grown/increased (what's the right terminology?) since the MRI in November, which explains the intensified pain. As it's impossible to tell which one is causing the pain (though they're guessing l4-5) both herniations are going to be removed, through a 4 cm(1 1/2") long incision.

When the PT demonstrated how to get out of bed post-op I looked at her, bewildered. Laying on my back, and rolling over to the side have been out of the question for so long, that it's almost impossible for me to believe I'll be attempting that in only a few days time.

Tomorrow, I'm working my last day. I've written all my lists, started packing my bag, and picked up that weird pre-op disinfectant soap that I have to scrub with on Wednesday night, and again at the hospital before the surgery. I'm off the voltaren (will start again post-op though), which means I can stop taking the ulcer med's soon too. In general, I feel that most of my question marks have been ironed out to happy exclamations today.

There's actually only one question left. How on earth am I going to be able to remove the nail polish on my toes??? (and why won't they allow pretty manicures in the operating room?)

[ajj1001]

For the first time in ages, I don't feel scared. Instead I'm happy, peaceful, and optimistic

There's actually only one question left. How on earth am I going to be able to remove the nail polish on my toes??? (and why won't they allow pretty manicures in the operating room?)

Its good that you are feeling happy. Hold on to those thoughts! Thinking positive thoughts for you as well.

ref Nail polish - That's what good friends and children are for!